User blog comment:Lyth Streambattle/Lyth's Secret (still in progress)./@comment-1665903-20091106014838

Very cool, I really liked it, especially the Gaelmount Isle description. If you're willing to accept, I do have some criticism, you use the word "pike" too much, sometimes replace pike with "great fish" or "scaly monster" something really to keep the writing fresh, the same goes for the word "dwelling" replace it with "home", or "cave".

One more thing, if you want more people to read it, indent whenever someone is speaking, it makes it seem shorter. All in all it was a fantastic story, I could see this becoming popular.