User blog:Umrag the Destroyer/Three Insane Ones, One Mob

This is a comedy.

Prolouge
Riggster, a fox thief, paddled up next to a big galleon. 'Ah bet ah can find somting cozy in here, the noo?' When no answer was forthcoming, he pulled out a war hammer and began stealthinly climbing the walls. With all the falling timber, it's a wonder nobody heard him. He climbed up. The first thing he noticed were the dead vermin bodies, with two holes in between their eyes. He went on. Then, he heard some noise. He turned, and almost ran into a pai of sccisors. The otter holding them whirled around, and shoved Riggster back, pushing the blades inbetween his eyes. "You sees these, punk?! These are sharp objects, punk! They can kill you, alright, punk?! Be careful near them, punk!" The fox went crosseyed, trying to look at the blades. "Yes, sir." "Don't call me sir, punk! Call me 'Your Majesty'!" Everything went still for a moment as they studied the italics. Then a purple mole shambled up, saying, "This is my gurt soil you're standing on, scum!" Riggster looked down. "This is soil?!" The otter stabbed him in the face. "Good work, Dingertium, your diversion worked!" A very pretty squirrelmaid ambled up, holding a sword behind her back. She was perhaps the least insane of the trio {which means she wasn't insane} but she was very pretty. Her name was... Zlembena the Enchantress! Once again, the italics were throughly studied. "So, mates where are we going now?" Digentium turned to her. "Home!" They were not aware of the large, cute, evil eyes that were studying them. "Was that word bolded?!"