User blog comment:Peony Laminar/Peony Laminar/@comment-From the South/@comment-1884658-20100518190021

That's good! Is Dann gonna tell Beech some of his past?

Here's evil critisism.

Thalweg has never liked marshes and swamps. I think "had" should replace "has."

The stoat seemed to be paying more care to the mud on the bottom of his blue cloak than to the rats’ efforts to light dislodge the cart. I don't think you need the "light."

But she didn’t need to wait long for long for the answer. You don't need two "long for"s.

She said her father developed a free standing device that shots arrows. I think you meant "shoots."

Alma was walking next to her friend Lorica, but Lorica De Fformelo Tussock was deep in conversation with Sage Sinistra, exchanging stories that they had heard from their parents who they had been on the same patrol. I don't think you need the "they."

Do you want me to put a lid on the critisism?