User blog comment:Ronnie Macleaf/The Black Robes/@comment-1488988-20120123003824

A group of squirrel assassins, eh? Very interesting. The prologue was quite cool, with the chant thing and the NINJA-SQUIRREL-ATTACKING-RANDOM-EVIL-DUDE thing. I also liked the last part with Dave and Simi. This Dave character seems like quite the guy. xD

The main critiques I'll give you are that you should try to write longer chapters (write more at a time) and be more careful with your characterization (some of the characters are suspiciously Mary Sue-esque.) Another thing: although your English is very good for someone who isn't a native speaker, I picked out quite a few grammar errors ... you might want to look into that. (I can list them out for you if you like.)

Keep writing! :)

~ Songflower

(P.S. I'll try to read one of your other stories at some point in the near future ...)